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Archive for January, 2009

A Miracle In My Arms

Proverbs 19:21 21 Many are the plans in a man’s heart,
       but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails. 

pr-3-month-005

Tonight while the world outside was held deep in the grasp of winter’s chill, I rocked my 5 month old baby girl to sleep.  She was warm, safe, and secure in her daddy’s arms.  As I marveled at her beauty and even my own affections for her something dawned on me, she is a miracle.  I often hear people refer to new borns or soon to be born babies as “miracles.”   While I know what they mean I disagree with their terminology.  Please don’t misunderstand me.  I believe every new life is a gift from God( James 1:7).  However, I know as well that the idea of a man’s seed combined with a woman’s egg produces a complex and sophisticated being is truly amazing.  It’s just that it is not a miracle in the truest sense of the word.  A miracle as I understand it is something that happens beyond the limits or realities of the space time continuum we live in.  A miracle is something that is without proper scientific, logical, or other explanation.   That being said I am even further convinced Perry Rose Stewart is a miracle.  You see Perry Rose should not be safely tucked in her bed right now.  She logically shouldn’t BE at all.  How do I know this?  Because I, her dad apart from the divine providence and intervention of God would not be here today writing this holding her.  Eleven years ago as a freshman in college only weeks into the new school year I did something terrible, something completely illogical, something selfish and evil.   I attempted to commit suicide.  After a year of battling serious and almost constant depression, I decided I’d had all of life I could take.  So late one night while my mother, father, and brother slept, (I was still living at home at the time while attending and playing basketball on scholarship at a junior college just a half hour away) I crept downstairs opened the medicine basket located in the kitchen in a cabinet directly above the stove and took many, many sleeping pills.  The number of pills only God knows.  I know it was way too many.  If you had been there you would have seen it was way too many all mixed together in a very short amount of time.  I awoke 2 days later in a hospital room confused, shaken, and thankful to be alive.  I committed my life to Christ there shortly after.  Believing that since he saved me from the hand of death, he indeed had plans for me far beyond my understanding.  That is why I looked upon Perry tonight with eyes of gratitude and amazement.  Knowing that a miracle took place 7 years ago that she is apart of today.  Why share this story you might ask.  I never talk about it even with my wife, and I rarely even think about the event.  Certainly I am allowing myself to be very vulnerable in posting this on my internet blog.  Well, because my story is part of a bigger story, a God story.  A story about a God who loved humanity to the point of allowing himself to be executed Roman style on a cross some 2,000 years ago(John 3:16, Philippians 2:8, Romans 5:8).  It is a story about God’s soverign and providential plans for our lives that extends well beyond this present generation(Exodus 3:15).  You see God saving my life (both spiritually and physically) is about Perry Rose and God willing her children, and their children , and on down the line.  It’s about using my great-great-great grandson (who I will likely never meet here on earth) to share the good news of Jesus Christ with his college roommate and him falling on his news and exclaiming, “That’s it!  That is what I have been looking for.  Finally, I have found the great pearl of an immeasurable price!”   My life is about Perry Rose, her future husband, their children, and many other people some I will and others I will never meet.  My mind can’t even begin to imagine what God will do through those who come after me.  I just know as I looked in my daughters eyes tonight I saw a miracle.  A miracle that I pray will touch the hearts and minds of many, many in the name of Jesus Christ.

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